Open and Willing

Confession: The word focus can give me the heebie-jeebies.
No, not the focus on a camera, although I’ve been known to have trouble with that too. I’m talking about the word focus when it comes to blogs.

I’m kinda auditing Edie Melson’s course on blogging. I love Edie’s teaching and always learn something from her. She really knows those fine points, those little details that I love discovering, so that’s why I’m buzzing through her lessons and some of the responses. I want to learn. I want to stay somewhat on top of what I love and do.

But of course there’s that focus word…

How things look with the wrong focus!

I knew I’d see it. I expected it and was braced for it.
But I still wasn’t prepared for it.

After reading through several lessons, I had to leave the computer. I needed space and time to think.

What’s my focus here?
That led to… What’s the focus of my life? That one was easier. Obedience. I want my life to bring glory to God.

Does that tie in to my blog?
Yes.

I thought about the things Edie told us to—LoL, the very same things I’ve taught on here…
I thought about posts and comments and what others have told me in relation to my blog because I care about my readers and their thoughts and what they like and don’t.

And I kept coming back to how my personal focus affects and ties into my blog focus.
Is it a platform? After all, platform is often a key reason for blogging. No. In many ways, I don’t really care about a platform. I mean, if God wants me to stand in a corner and whisper to myself, I’ll do that.

Then I stop and think about THAT.

I’ve pulled away from my online commitments—the blogs I contributed to, and dearly love. This year could be a year of silence for me. I thought about Amy Carmichael, who spent time in silence, not that she chose to but because God chose it for her. I could be lining up for a modern version of that. Could I…would I…accept that?

Another thing some friends have been chatting about is letting go.

Am I willing to let go of my voice here on my blog?

I recently unclenched my hands—letting go of those online commitments. Sometimes it feels like my hands are empty even though they’re still so very busy.

Now it’s time to be open to the things God puts in my hands.

Even if that is silence.

My point is this:

Am I willing to be obedient even if it means silence?

What about you? Are you staying open and willing to what God has for you this year?

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Heart Highways

In 2009 God blessed me with a dog I never thought I'd have and I named her Gracie because she's a tangible reminder of God's grace in my life. In the many months I've had her, she's provided comfort and reassurance of God's constant love, presence and purpose in my life and she's taught me many things. Like most dogs, Gracie is a creature of habit. Although not all of her habits are good, one of them is stellar. She watches over us and protects us with her big bark. Her consistency in this became crystal clear early one morning. There, across the road, was a path Gracie had worn through the snow with her constant trotting back and forth. That got me thinking about a verse I had read just moments before...

How blessed is the man whose strength is in You,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
~Psalm 84:5

All of us have paths in our heart. Some of those paths might lead to a friend's house and sympathetic ear, or a family member that has always been a source of strength and comfort to us. Other paths might not end in such nice places. They might lead you straight to worry or depression or fear. The path you want to make into a highway is the path you take to the throne of God.

The inhabitants of one will go to another, saying, “Let us go at once to entreat the favor of the Lord, and to seek the Lord of hosts; I will also go.” ~Zechariah 8:21

Sometimes the landscape of my heart looks like my yard does after the kids have been outside to play in the snow. Tracks everywhere. There's no way I could follow their path after they've been outside playing for a few hours. That's not how I want my heart to be. That's not how I want my life to be either. I want those around me to be able to easily follow my path to a favorite place—the throne room of God.

That makes me wonder, have we traveled the path to God often enough to etch a path? On days when the going is rough and it's dark or foggy all around us, having a well beaten path to follow to God's throne room is a great help, especially when we're so exhausted it's hard to place one foot in front of the other. In fact, when we're that tired, a highway is what we really want. Smooth going and easy to follow.

Come and let us go up to the mountain of the Lord and to the house of the God of Jacob, that He may teach us about His ways and that we may walk in His paths. ~Micah 4:2

Let's wear wide, smooth paths to God's presence by traveling there many times a day. We want our paths to be as easy to follow as Gracie's path through snow was.

I was glad when they said to me, “Let us go to the house of the Lord.” Psalm 122:1

If we want highways in our hearts then we need to consistently walk the same path. An occasional trip may leave enough footprints to see and follow but it will not wear a path.

Gracie's highway went to the far edge of the orchard, one of her favorite places to hang out, and it was a perfect example of how I want my heart to look.

I want a clearly defined path straight to the throne room of God. Don't you?

So tell me, how's your path looking? I'm gonna go work on mine... 

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Fear's Role in Procrastination

Okay, so even by writing this post, I'm procrastinating.
I'm using this to put off doing what I really, really need to be doing, but I just can't pass up the opportunity. (Even that is pathetic because my past procrastination is making it so I'm missing out on a great opportunity today. And yet, here I am writing this.)

I'm a procrastinator at heart. Pathetically so.

I know all the reasons I need to push on. I know the importance of it. I know that procrastinating could easily kill all hope of what I'm hoping for and what I've been working for and I feel God has for me. But sometimes there's something even bigger than all those things I know.

Fear.

Fear of what? Fear of failure.
If it's not done, it can't fail.

Am I the only one who deals with this??

And I even know the verses to fight this fear—because I've searched them out so often!

So here's the verse that's pulling me out of this bog fueled by fear:

For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline. ~2 Timothy 1:7 NAS

Timidity. Cowardice. Fear. It's NOT what God has given us!

God's given us power. His power. “Miraculous power,” might and strength.
And love.
And discipline. Now there's a word we love to hate. Discipline. Self-control.

THAT's what God has given us.
That means that any time I let fear have control, I'm turning my back on God and what He has given me and choosing the hog swill of fear instead.

How dumb is that?!?!

Sooooo, now that I've put that in perspective (for myself), guess what I'm off to do?
Work. In power, love and discipline—those awesomely cool gifts God gave me.

So tell me, why do you procrastinate?

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Blinders, Please!

I love going to the fair! It's something my mother taught me to love when I was a little girl and is still one of the highlights of my year. Unfortunately, I don't get to see one of the best parts very often. The heavy horse pull is my absolute favorite and it never ceases to amaze me. The horses are massive and beautiful and they're so well trained.

Draft horses are used for the horse pull and the winner of the competition is the team that can pull the most weight, which is often concrete weights on a sled. Horse pulling goes back to the teamster days when neighbors would challenge each other to see who had the strongest team. Even though we don't rely on draft horses to do the heavy work any more, horse pulls are still popular and still draw big crowds. As a little girl, when we went to the fair, we made sure it was a night with horse pulling. The magic is still there for me, even after all these years.

I used to feel bad for some of the teams because they wore blinders. I thought it was mean of the pullers because I didn't understand the need for them, nor the benefits. I don't know about you, but I'm easily distracted. All it takes is something along the sidelines and my concentration is broken and my focus is shifted. Suddenly I realize that I'm moving toward something different than what I originally started for. In a horse pull, that will cause a team to lose, and it only takes one distracted horse to throw off the whole team. So what do pullers do? They put blinders on the horses, drastically reducing the possible distractions and helping them focus straight ahead, which in turns helps the horses pull straight and true. In the days when draft horses were essential to heavy work, you didn't want a team that was constantly side tracked and that veered from side-to-side as their attention wandered. If they were to do that, they would wear themselves out unnecessarily and accomplish only a fraction of what they could have. The blinders are a tool used for the team's overall good.

...let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. ~Hebrews 12:1-3 NAS

Not only that, but have you ever noticed that when someone has restricted vision they are more sensitive to the sounds going on around them? I've often seen the horses' muscles quivering in readiness and their ears twitch as they listen closely for their puller's voice. They respond to his directions—both verbal and physical. When they have blinders on, they're forced to pay attention to his directions through the reins and they must listen closer to his voice.

My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me;
~John 10:27 NAS

When we wear the blinders of focusing solely on Jesus, we can hear His voice better, even if there's a crowded, noisy grandstand around us. We're more tuned in to His hands on the reins of our life when our eyes are fixed on Christ.

Blinders aren't punishment.
Blinders are beneficial for believers. It's so easy to became sidetracked by the world around us. We need to borrow blinders off a horse to help keep our eyes fixed straight in front of us, on our Lord and Savior. On what He wants us to do.

Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. ~1 Peter 1:13 NAS

I've seen horses that end up at the fences because they are focused on the wrong things. I've also seen them weave back and forth because they lacked the focus of a defined goal. The winners are those that stay the course until the end.

So tell me, 
how can we put blinders on?
Won't you join us at Living by Grace as we chat about this throughout the day?

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My 3 Fs

Fickle, Failure, & Faithful
These three words have been on my mind a lot this past few weeks. And I do mean a lot.

Yes, I am fickle. I'll admit that right up front. But it's not just girlie fickleness—it's that many times I honestly do not care which way I go. (When I have an opinion I'm just plain mulish. Ask my husband. *eye roll*) So when I see things opening up one direction and feel a leading, I'm good to go with it, and I do. But that tends to lead toward... failure. Or seeming failure.

How so? Well, as I venture through different doors I may get part way through and the door closes on me. That doesn't bother me at all—I see it as God clearly closing the door. Other times I get through the door and I'm ready to take off. I have everything prepped and ready and I'm excited. But the room that open door led to is empty. Not a single thing in there. Failure.

Or is it?
Well, I know from experience that people looking on often see it as failure. And fickleness. Now, I really don't like being seen as a fickle failure. Does anyone? But yanno, the it ain't over 'til it's over... and it ain't over yet! (See my eyes rolling as I snicker?)

This is where faithfulness comes in. Well, actually, faithfulness is woven throughout as I try to faithfully stay close to God and faithfully obey, and faithfully evaluate where things are. And this is exactly where I've been the last couple weeks: evaluating. (And that, my friends, will be another post! It's in the works.)

I've walked through a door recently and everything came together beautifully. Everything. I was ready to run and prepared for a marathon. But the starting gun never fired, leaving me toed in at the starting line. The door that was flung open to me led to a room that's empty. Not a single thing there. All the encouragement and help and cheering on that I've received and now when friends ask, excited for me, I have to tell them it opened to... nothing. Since I prayed much over the event (and still do) I'm not upset by it—but every now and then those first two f words ambush me. Yanno, fickle and failure.

So tell me, 
where do you think faithfulness fits with fickle and failure? 
Does seeming failure imply fickleness, or worse, faithLESSness?

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Doozie Day

Saturday was a doozie for me. I was a basket-case.

It all started when my friend nailed me hard about my intent concerning publication, and I waffled. She asked me the same question 3-4 times and I pussy-footed around each time. And she knew it.

You see, I KNOW God has called me to write, and I'm writing. I watch the discussions on the ACFW email loop about being published and I always want to jump in and say But even if God called you to write, He might not have called you to publication. You have to write how, when and where He has for you to write. Even if it's for just one.

I love writing fiction. It's my first love, BUT I'm not hung up on being published. Truly, I'm not. Sure, I'd love to be, but my life will still feel fulfilled if I'm not, as long as I know I'm holding tight to God's hand and following Him. I'm also willing to do the work if publication is His will for me. But I hafta tell ya, the thought of all that is scary. There's a lot to it. It's not just writing books, it's so much more, and to be honest, staying in my comfy, cozy cave, as it is now, really appeals to me. Remember, I'm a chicken at heart and choosing the easy way out is just too... EASY for me!

So God used my friend to wallop me. And it was a doozie. But it was also effective. I changed my plans for this month and stepped out of my comfort zone, and I mean waaaaay out! I'm polishing a manuscript I have so I can pitch it at the Faithwriters conference. What God does with it is up to Him. My responsibility is to follow and obey Him, He'll handle the results. And I want God's best for my life, not a pathetic substitute.

What about you? Is there something you're waffling over or evading in the hopes it will go away?

Let's pursue God's best for our lives and trust that His grace will carry us through the tough and scary parts!

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Finding Focus

Today's a new day for me here at Patterings and my new header is part of it...but first, our winner. Robin Prater is the winner of Jenness Walker's book, Double Take. Congratulations, Robin and thank you, Jenness!

One of the things that I've been mulling over for a few months is my tagline. I know, on the scale of important things in life, a tagline isn't too far up, but still, it's been niggling at the back of my mind. Why? Because I've found that my tagline helps define and direct my my energies and I need all the help there I can get! LoL

For a long time I used 'Dancing through the showers of life.' After all, it's part of of what I write about and is even part of how I approach life. But it just wasn't a good fit, so I was mulling things over, casting around for ideas.

Awhile back I was privileged to be in the blog spotlight in the Exemplify Magazine and in my introduction, Kristen used the words “find the ordinary to be extraordinary.” Since then, those words have been running around in my head while I was still back pedaling. That was a big 'whoa baby!' for me. Finally I emailed one of my near-and-dears, Joanne, and told her what I was thinking and playing with. Five minutes later, after playing with words and wording, she sent me the suggestion of 'Finding the extraordinary God in our ordinary lives.' As soon as I read it, I knew it was a fit. THE fit I'd been searching for. (Thank you, JoDear!!)

I also don't think it's a coincidence that the tagline came together when it did. I'm still in my 40 day birthday celebration and I'm on track with finishing reading the Bible through cover-to-cover by my birthday, just like I decided I wanted to do to help me prepare for this upcoming year. It's been wonderful spending extra time in God's Word...

Since wrapping that tag line around me and keeping it before me, I've enjoyed the direction and focus it's given me. Direction and focus I sorely needed not just in my blogging and writing, but in my daily life too. As strange as it sounds, having that tagline has freed me to soar exactly where I always wanted to. It's been wonderful.

So welcome to Patterings where I enjoy Finding the extraordinary God in our ordinary lives. *sigh* I love it. It fits and it makes me happy, and more importantly, it frees me to fly.

So what about you? Do you have a tagline that fits you? If you do, or if you have one you've been playing with, share it with us! I'd love to hear yours and if having one has helped you find focus.

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Diligence in Sounding Out

Whooo-ey! What a weekend! We were out of the house all day on Saturday (I'll post some pictures of what we were doing this Saturday *g*) and Sunday I GOT to work through extreme tiredness and a brain that was AWOL to meet a deadline--which I met, and had the right attitude about! =] Today started with a bang and now we're finally hunkered down to school work. Finally.

Now that my brain has returned I realize I didn't get a winner posted yesterday. The winner of Leann Harris' book Guarded Secrets is Sunny!

Don't forget that Maggie Woychik's book giveaway is still going on and will be open until late Saturday night. Leave a comment to be entered in her drawing! =]

On deck for tomorrow: an Author Spotlight with Erica Vetsch and her debut novel.

These days my mind is full of school work, and much of my time is spent at the table doing school--so here's a post from last year that centers on school and looking for God's will. Two things I'm doing a lot of even now. =]

~*~*~*~*~*~
My youngest has been reading to me lately, and it's been a learning experience. Many times I've had to tap the word and even remind him to look at the word he was sounding out. I asked him, “How can you know what the word is unless you look at it?”

God's special neon 'Duh' sign flashed at me.

It was as if He was asking me how I planned on knowing what His will for me was unless I kept my eye focused on Him and sought it out. Just like my son can't sound out a word he isn't looking at, I can't sound out or decipher a plan I don't have my eyes on. I'm as bad as my little boy. I'll look at the word, then at the picture, then fiddle with the corner of the page and wonder what's on the next page, then scratch my ear and rub my nose, all before I even realize that my attention has wandered from the direction from God that I'm trying to seek out. I need to constantly refocus and remind myself to seek God in this matter, not just be content with my wandering thoughts and wandering life.

For if you cry for discernment, lift your voice for understanding; if you seek her as silver, and search for her as for hidden treasures; then you will discern the fear of the Lord, and discover the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding. ~Proverbs 2:3-6

Lord, help me to focus on You and seek diligently what it is You want me to be doing. I want to do Your will, please help me to fix my eyes on You and seek it. I love You, Father, in Your name I pray, amen.

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Got Peace?

Today is Monday Manna at An Open Book and Joanne gave us a wonderful passage! It's also Joanne's birthday today so be sure to stop by and wish her a happy birthday!

Happy Birthday, JoDear!! You're an inspiration to me and a super special sister-of-the-soul. :)

4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:4-9)

This is one of those all-time great passages of the Bible that so many of us turn to quite often. When I read through it this time I notice “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Probably because in the zoo-iness of life peace is hard to come by.

I don't know about you, but if I feel God's peace inside me I can handle so much more chaos in my life than without it. His peace truly guards my heart and mind, keeping me anchored and secure. Peaceful in the midst of the storm. That peace surely “surpasses all comprehension.”

So how can I find that peace? How can I consistently have God's peace in my life? I think the rest of the passage tells us how.
**rejoice
**REJOICE!! :)
**don't be anxious or worry
**pray instead
**focus your mind on the things of God

In every area and every circumstance and situation we're to talk with God—that personal communication with Him that's known as prayer. Not a rote prayer that we simply repeat over and over, but deep, intimate conversation like we have with a sister, close friend or spouse. When we're in close and constant contact with God, His peace is much closer than when we're not.

Another thing I think is key to having God's peace is our focus. Is my mind focused on God, and things of God, or is it distracted with the million and one things crowding around me, yapping at me. I've found that, even when I talk with God a lot, I can still have the wrong focus. I can cry and whine and complain constantly to God...and never know peace. Or I can set those things behind me, focus on the good--on God and know His peace, even when the situation is exactly the same.

That's the peace of God that guards my heart and mind. It can keep me calm in the midst of chaos just as surely as it keeps me anchored and secure in His Sovereignty.

So tell me, have you got peace?

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Where's Your Focus?

When I was putting on my eyeliner the other day, I noticed that although I wasn't in a shadow, I wasn't getting the benefits of full, direct light. So, I tilted my head just a touch and I was able to see so much better.

I thought about this as I finished putting on my makeup, and how it parallels my spiritual life. There are times when I'm in The Word and growing, but I'm not tilted just right to catch the full benefit of the Light, so I don't see all the things God has for me to see. A simple fine-tune adjustment is all it takes to be fully in the Light. The other week, Pastor Mike showed me the adjustment I needed to make in my spiritual life.

For many months the cry of my heart has been for God to use me, that my life would count for Him. Although I was standing in the Light with that prayer and desire, I wasn't getting the full 'benefit' of the Light. I had wrong priorities.

And if My people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin and will heal their land. ~2 Chronicles 7:14

I realized I was seeking God's hand more than I was seeking His face. Yes, I was seeking Him, but my eyes were focused on His hands all too often. The words to the old hymn are a great reminder of this.
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
look full in His wonderful face.
And the things of earth
will grow strangely dim,
in the Light of His glory and grace.

I needed to make that fine-tune adjustment and shift my main focus from His hands to His face, and remember that He will take care of the rest. Yes, ask for His hand of help, mercy and blessing, but seek His face first and foremost.

Don't focus on what we face
but on Who we face—God Almighty.

...and the things of earth will grow strangely dim
in the Light of His glory and grace.

Heavenly Father, so many times I've sought Your hand—for help and guidance and blessing, but Lord, it's Your face that I long to see. Help me to remember to make that fine-tune adjustment and to seek Your face, knowing that You will take care of all the rest. I love You, Lord. In Your name I pray, amen.

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Ferris Wheel Feelings

Recently my life has felt like a ferris wheel—which is not a good thing since I'm not a fan of them. Maybe, if I could run the controls, it would help. We would only go up so high, maybe about half as high as they have it set for, and I'd arrange it so I could get off at any point, not only when they say.

But that's not how it is. You get on the ride and you slowly inch and jerk your way up and around while they load all the other riders—all the while you're trying to figure out how you let yourself get talked into this. When you finally make it back to the starting point, you're not done. Oh no! That's when they throw it into high gear and you're stuck forever. Up. Around. Down. Around. Up. Around. Until you think you might just try climbing out and down and your self control is about to snap.

Out of desperation, you try talking to your seat mate in the hopes that distraction will help. It helps, but only a little. You're still going up and down and you're still miserable. Are you doomed forever? Or at least until the ride finally grinds to an end and you inch and jerk your way back down and can get off?

No, you don't have to be doomed. I learned an important lesson while at the top of a ferris wheel. If you take your focus off your immediate surroundings and look as far off as you can, it doesn't seem so bad.

My life these days has left me feeling like I'm on a ferris wheel again, and it's not been a nice feeling! My emotions have been spinning so fast I don't know which end is up and I was ready to try climbing down when I finally remembered what I had learned.

...fixing our eyes on Jesus... ~Hebrews 12:2

My focus was in the wrong place. I was wrapped up in each passing moment, my eyes fixed on the here and now, and as a result I was up, down, and all around, a hundred times over. When I turned and deliberately looked at my Savior, and focused entirely on Him, the pitching and rolling of my emotions slowed and eased. Fear unwrapped its fingers from my throat, worry converted to prayer, and peace filtered into my soul. Is everything peachy and perfect? No, not at all, but the pitching and rolling of my emotions has settled enough so that I'm not thinking about climbing out anymore.

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance, and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you may not grow weary and lose heart. ~Hebrews 12:1-3

When we take our eyes off our circumstances we see that there's more to life than just the little ride we're on. There's an eternity that we need to keep in mind and live accordingly.

Missions Matter! ~Blog Giveaway coming November 12th!

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