Joyously Abandoned

In my post Face the If I mentioned how Wilda Mathews was caught in the trap of 'if onlys' on Easter Sunday 1952, deep in the heart of Communist China. A year later, as Easter rolled around again, she was determined that it wouldn't be another black day for her. She started studying the resurrection story and resurrection life, and when she came to Peter's part she felt condemned.

She had not said, 'I know Him not' but she had no joy. She was not bitter, but she was frustrated and restless. Her opportunity to witness to the Chinese eyes around them that she did know the Lord and that He was satisfying her drought—had she shown that? If not, wasn't that denying the Lord before man?

As I've read that many times now, I'm constantly convicted by it. Am I joyfully living? Like Wilda, I'm not bitter, but I've certainly been frustrated and restless at times. Can others see that Christ is not just meeting my needs, but fulfilling me, too? That His Life is flowing through me? Would others see my green leaves even though my life might be in the biggest drought yet to face me?

Two months later, Wilda's husband, Arthur, came to a similar conclusion. He had been reading Ephesians 5:10 and asked her what she thought was “well-pleasing to the Lord in these our experiences?” As they talked it over, Wilda was able to share with him her Easter lesson:

Not to receive it joyfully was to deny the Lord before men...A few nights later it came to Arthur like a flash: the Son had left Heaven, not submitting to the will of God, but delighting in it. Up to now they had been submitting; rather feverishly submitting...

The Son had left Heaven, not submitting to the will of God, but delighting in it.

In a letter home, Arthur wrote this about all they had learned:
Just to say submission to the will of God did not seem to go deep enough, for we had been trying for a long time to do just that. If you had a servant you would expect submission from him, just as you would from an old bullock with a yoke on its neck. But as sons surely there was something more than that.

...So as we uncovered the earth we could see that our prayers had selfishly centered around the shortening of the days...There was none of the recklessness of faith such as the three friends of Daniel showed. Nor was there the spirit of joyous abandonment which the widow displayed in giving her two mites.

So we came to see that God wanted us to will with Him to stay put; not to desire to run away as quickly as we could persuade Him to let us...The great chords that sounded through our hearts as we touched the Joyously Abandoned keys were really thrilling...

So we are no longer stupid bullocks being driven or dragged unwillingly along a distasteful road; but sons, co-operating wholeheartedly with our Father...

The yoke is LIGHT only as it is TAKEN, and not as it is suffered.

Simple submission is not enough. Delighting in doing God's will, in living out the will of God for your life, is where the great joy is.

I haven't mentioned here all the things the Mathews lived with, and without during their years of waiting to be released from China, but their living conditions were such that the Chinese Christians pitied them. But was there a purpose for all that God asked of this missionary couple? Yes, there was a tremendous purpose! Here's how Isobel Kuhn wrote it:

The message above all others which the Chinese church needed was to see that truth lived out under circumstances equally harrowing as their own.

Arthur and Wilda had longed to serve Him; but humanlike they had put their own interpretation on what service is. They thought it meant preaching with their lips. Amy Carmichael once replied to a Tamil Christian who took this meaning of service: 'God didn't make you all mouth.' The most potent way to preach is by life, by living it. This was the service which the Mathews family were to render to Him.

The message of this chapter has been running through my mind for two weeks, now, and the affect it's had on me is deep.

Being joyously abandoned to God's will is where I want to be.


Italicized parts of this post are direct quotations from Green Leaf in Drought by Isobel Kuhn, chapter 8.
This is a repost from October 2008.

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Plant Your Own Garden

As I've mulled over this whole thing with validation I was reminded of this poem that I was introduced to in high school. It's one that's helped me remember that I cannot rely on others to affirm what I'm doing. Putting that burden on them is actually unfair to them. It makes me expect it of them, especially of those closest to me, and those expectations can lead to disappointment, disillusionment, and brokenness.

It's taking me years to learn this but I think I'm finally getting the hang of it a bit better. I have some ideas why too, but I'll share those another time...


Come the Dawn After a while you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t mean security,
And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes open
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,
And you learn to build all your roads on today,
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans,
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure...
That you really are strong,
And you really do have worth.
And you learn and learn...
With every goodbye you learn.

Unknown

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Tips and Tricks for Bible Memorization

Memorizing Bible verses isn't easy but it's one of those things that is very worthwhile.

Here's a few tricks to memorizing that I've learned along the way...

1. Ask God to help you!
2. Be accountable to a small group—your Bible study or prayer group, a friend who will ask you about it and prod you when necessary…
3. Write the verse on a card and post it somewhere you’ll see it or carry it in your pocket for quick and easy access.
4. Read the verse 5 times every day.
5. Draw a box around the verbs.
6. Use a site like BibleGateWay or BlueLetterBible to look up a keyword in the verse.
7. Use symbols to draw the verse then use it as a memory tool to help you visualize the verse. It really helps!! No artistic ability is needed. This is for you, not a gift for Rembrandt.
8. Sing the verse. Remember Silly Songs with Larry? Anything goes.

My personal favorite tricks are... 

• Write the verses using brightly colored pens (I write the verse 5-10 times, depending on my time and how well it's sticking in my head). The brighter the pens, the better it works.
• Look up every cross reference listed for the verses I'm working on. 
• Read about the verses in a commentary or two, to help me understand it more.
• Put motions to the verse. 

I have to admit though that if people were to actually see me doing the motions they'd probably laugh. When I was walking early in the mornings, I'd memorize. I was always very thankful we live on back-country roads so only the deer and dogs would see me waving my arms around. But it helped!! Now, as I drive to work I'll say my verses and my motions have to be limited to what I can do while driving. But, they still help!!

Try different things until you find what works for you.
But the biggest key: Just do it!

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Monkey Raspberries?

You never know what you're going to get when a monkey is posing for pictures.

He's really not blowing raspberries but sometimes I wonder.


When Toby sits with someone for a picture, we give him a small treat. He'll sit beside them munching, and often that creates a few funny shots.

#NaBloPoMo Day 12

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What’s in your hand?

In my Bible reading I’m in Judges and it’s capturing my attention. Othniel, Ehud, Shamgar, Gideon… men that God used. Men that, as I’ve dug into them a little, don’t look exactly like I pictured them other times I’ve read Judges.

For instance, take Shamgar. The one verse devoted to Shamgar tells us all we know about him.

After him came Shamgar the son of Anath, who struck down six hundred Philistines with an oxgoad; and he also saved Israel. ~Judges 3:31

What’s an oxgoad?
It’s a long stick with a point on one end and a shovel like blade of sorts on the other. One end is for prodding the oxen to keep them moving and the other end’s to scrape off the plow. It’s a farmer’s tool, not a warrior’s weapon.

In those days Israel had been deweaponized by their enemies. So, Shamgar used what he had. And with God’s help, he was successful and he saved Israel.

With an oxgoad.
No, that’s not true. He had more than an oxgoad. He had the Spirit of the Living God empowering him. And that’s what puts me and Shamgar on the same playing field. The Holy Spirit.

When God calls you, He empowers you to do what He’s called you to do and gives you the tools necessary. I wonder if Shamgar thought he had what he needed to save Israel? I doubt it. His enemies had real weapons and he had a farmer’s tool. But God didn’t give Shamgar weapons he probably thought he needed, weapons that would’ve come in handy. God used what Shamgar already had in his hands. An oxgoad. If Shamgar had gone on a quest to find the weapons he thought he needed before obeying God, he would’ve lost his opportunity.

This has had me thinking for days.

Am I obeying or delaying? Like Shamgar, I have the Holy Spirit empowering me. I’m sure I have my own version of an oxgoad—something that God has put in my hands, so I don’t need to go on a quest to find anything.

It boils down to simple obedience. I need to quit waiting for what I think are things I need in order to obey and just get on with obeying.

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Validation

As someone who writes, a question I’ve been mulling over is “Why do you want to be published?” (referring to traditional publishing) But really, this same question could be posed to anyone… “Why do you want to accomplish ______ in your chosen area?”

I get hung up on this question every time.
I don’t like my answer, even though it’s painfully honest.

I want to be published traditionally because I want the validation of it. I want someone to say that my work is good enough to warrant a contract and even payment. I want that seal of approval on my work. That proof. Something I can hold up and say, “See?!”

But every time I even think those words I hear a still, quiet voice in my heart saying, “Isn’t My approval enough?”

God did not use a cookie cutter when He created us. What’s right for my friend isn’t necessarily right for me. God may have called one of us to walk to the beat of a different drum. The key is to be obedient to what God’s called me to do. My calling, not someone else’s calling.

That means risking being different and maybe even appearing wrong. Sometimes that may mean the appearance of taking the easy way or a short cut. But the truth of the matter is that if it’s what God told me to do, then for me it’s right (and the other way may be the wrong way for me).

I need to obey what God's called me to do and look to Him for validation. Only Him.

So tell me, is validation something you struggle with? 
How do you deal with it?

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Contemplation

It’s a contemplative kind of day. One that comes once a year—every November 12th to be exact. A day that I usually set aside for looking at my life, for self-analysis and sometimes for goal setting.

Some questions I’m mulling over today…

• What’s been good about this last year that I want to continue with?
• What needs to go?
• What needs tweaking? Major tweaks or minor?
• What do I want to accomplish in this next year?
• What do I want to be?

To be honest, I’ve been happy with where I am. It’s been a year for sinking my roots deeper in Christ. Not because things are going so bad that I run to Him desperate for rescue, but because I’m going to Him just to be with Him, to soak in Him.

I have a feeling that another round of change is coming for me. Things that were removed for a time might be back in my life, but in a different way than they were before.

Interestingly enough, the question that has me most curious about and interested in is the last one. What do I want to be? Not do, be.

Sure, birthdays are for celebrating, but they’re also a good time to stop and inventory life. A time to contemplate some of the deeper things that I tend to shy away from.

So tell me, do you know what you want to be?

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