I've Missed You

Have you returned somewhere after being gone a real long time? You know that feeling of hesitancy? Nervousness? Even a touch of fear mixed in with the anticipation… Will they remember me? Will they still like me? Have our lives moved on so much that I won’t fit in or that we won’t connect like we used to?

That’s how I’m feeling.
I’ve been gone a long time. I never dreamed I would be gone…silent…for so long. During that time a lot of water has gone under the bridge (yes, a cliché. Forgive me?). We’ve both changed, grown. But friendships can survive time and distance. I hope ours can too.

I’ve missed you.

I’ve come to visit with you often, but like Zacharias, nothing came out when I opened my mouth, set my fingers to keyboard. There was so much I wanted to say. So much to tell you, but it was all too fresh. Too raw in my heart and mind. I didn’t know where to start. I didn’t know how to start. So I’d leave the keyboard, the blank page disappearing into the fog I was walking through. But I never forgot you. I often thought of you, prayed for you, my friends.

But now it’s time.
The burning in me is greater than the hesitancy, the nervousness, and the fear. I’ve remembered why I came here... Why I write.

Obedience.
And obedience leads to joy.
I can feel it returning even now. Joy welling up, clogging my throat and filling my eyes…

And now that I’ve started, the words are coming fast. Crowding, anxious to catch up with you.

I know I’ve changed over the time. My thoughts, my actions, my voice. Age and experience do that to us. But inside I’m still me. And I bet you’re still you, changed but still you.

Cookie, one of our newest additions to the family.
Remember the old nursery rhyme… Pussy cat, pussy cat, where have you been? Like the cat, I feel like I’ve been to London to visit the queen…only I’ve seen so much more than the queen. LoL. Family, fairs, fun. Mom-stuff, monkey-stuff, mail-stuff. More change than I ever, EVER would’ve guessed. But through it all: God’s presence and faithfulness. Always. In all circumstances and all situations.

And now? Now I manage a shipping warehouse. I have a wonderful, God-given job that I love. My boys go to the warehouse with me everyday and are able to finish their homeschooling even though I work full-time. The family is constantly in-and-out of the warehouse, visiting, working, eating lunch, hanging out. It’s wonderful. It’s like having my cake and eating it too. Something I’ve always enjoyed. ::grin::

So tell me, what have you been up to? What’s new in your world?
I’ve missed you.

10 comments:

  1. You KNOW I've missed you too! You know I've been praying. What's new with ME (that you don't already know)? Hmmm. I'm probably going to Greenfield Village with my daughter's fifth grade class for the (long!) day in May. Excited - have wanted to go since I moved to Michigan!

    Praying (and sharing this post)

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    1. ((JoDear)) You're right, that does sound like a fun and exhausting day! LoL. Enjoy it. =]

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  2. I've missed you too, Peej. What have I been doing? (gone missing too) A change in my life seems to stop up my writing resevoir. My blog is getting parched with lack of new posts. It's time to dig out the clutter and let the sap flow.

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    1. Oh Vonnie, so many changes in your life, too! I've gotten a hint of them as I scroll through things. You've been on my mind. Hope you can carve out that time and space to write!!

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  3. I've been thinking about you (and praying!) So glad to hear from you.
    What have I been doing? My first Adirondack romance, Entrusted is now available and I'm marketing that while revising the second, Entangled. The Love Boat Bachelor is a collaborative novel from the authors at Write Integrity Press and we had fun writing and marketing that as readers voted on the heroine/ending. And the wife/mom thing, where everyone is growing and keeping busy. (((hugs)))

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    1. Julie!!! So cool to hear! That's fantastic! Congratulations! Write Integrity Press is great. So glad you got in there. =]

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  4. Hi Patty, great to hear from you! I've been knee-deep in finishing up the story of my childhood - How God blessed and sustained our family in spite of an alcoholic father and difficult circumstances. It will be coffee table style with lots of photos, sketches and recipes. I've been in contact with a local publisher, "GooseRiver Press, who is willing to read the manuscript. I'll be sending it, Lord willing, within the next two or three days! I'm really excited and trust this is going to be to God's glory! Appreciate prayer - Thanks!!

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    1. Hi Flora! What a wonderful project! And so close to completion. You're doing great! Way to go!!!! =]

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  5. Your name came to my my mind just last night, Patty, and here you are! You may have been AWOL for a time, but certainly never forgotten. I've missed your little monkey/boys also. Welcome back!

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    1. Thank you, Nancy! You've come to mind many times too, you and your ladies. I still pray for them and for you. =]

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